Monday, April 23, 2012

Nausea

I hate it when people say that life comes a full circle, I hate it when I say it too.
Well, not when I say it but later on.
I mean, I'd rather not run around in circles. Sometimes I just want to run to the circumference and give it a sharp jolt and get out of this thing that pushes me into myself. Even if it throws me out into an eternity of darkness, even if it pains, even if it means that I am ejected with a force that makes my head hit against something hard; leaving me to splatter all over. I'd rather splatter than remain.
I do not want the familiar, the habitual or the regular. Give me a new.
A new something, a new anything. For everyday. For any day.
These circles make me giddy and I vomit.
Right here- in the same place I vomited yesterday, right where I'll come to vomit tomorrow.

8 comments:

Karno Guhathakurta said...

Sometimes a slight act of regurgitation can set your mind straight too. :)

Magically Bored said...

Somehow, on some level, I get what this is about, or at least, what it feels like. Most of the time we run around in circles, and come back to the same situations in our own lives, only differently arranged. It takes tremendous self-control, or great luck, I think, to be able to move beyond these circles.

Sree said...

Sometimes the circle seems like an eternity by itself

so?hi!kneee. said...

i So get this feeling!its like getting caged.i feel like i know how the birds feel once they lose their freedom.

Zeba said...

Oh my. That's distressing. Take a wrong turn, arrive at a new place. Find a new spot to vomit. :-)

Saudamini said...

Oh, I so get this! Beautifully written, as always.

Aruni RC said...

To hate the smell of Everyday in the morning. yes indeed.
and well written as always.

hobo raksha said...

Beautifully written, BDC. I guess the trick is to change, take a wrong turn and then look back at the circle and point at it and laugh! Luck with that!