Tuesday, January 1, 2008

The Year That Was

First things first...I find 31st December highly overrated. Probably because I always end up spending it in the lousiest way possible-feeling like shit myself and crying without any reason whatsoever. Each year ends with me claiming that “this was the lousiest 31st”, but I’m disillusioned, without fail, in the end of the next year.

Coming back to the topic...The Year That Was.

I turned 18 and passed my boards (Phew! Thank God) and then I left home-with tears and feeling like an uprooted plant.

The plant never found its roots back, but, in a real freak of nature, grew up. I learnt how to not cry over the phone even when I was dying to, I learnt you never have friends-you only think you have them. With so much of learning cramming up my little head, I had to grow up-into a person who broke away from the walls 18 years at home had built. I fought my demons-at least, tried to.

This year marked a year of meeting the most important person in my life. We’ve been through a lot of shit, probably more than we ever dreamt of. But we pulled through it all safely and still continue to create moments of magic which will go on and become the most cherished memories of our lives.

I lost friends and (hopefully) met some new ones. I lost hope that everything will be fine, because they never will be. I lost my belief that after fifteen years of togetherness, ties and bonds will remain the same. They don’t.

And yes, I lost my purse. Twice. My debit card. Once (thankfully!).And my ring (and then, got two new ones)!

In spite of the slaps, the drunken brawls, the high billirubin level and the sinking physics marks, I’m glad this year turned out the way it did. I learnt to live-on my own, without people whom I thought I can’t live without.

Thanks. For teaching me to look beyond familiar faces for answers to questions I never dared to ask before, and for letting me add on to my blue confetti dream...

So here I end, with eyes full of dreams which strive for fulfillment and a mind full of hopes that things don’t get any worse.

To anyone who’s wasting time reading this...Have a great year ahead!

P.S: Here’s to Ingy...the new kid on the block-the last drop of life which fell on a dying year...


Neel said...

One of your most unforgettable pieces. Genuinely heartfelt. Like a rare transparent stone that's crystal clear. I luvd the P.S. especially.
Soon will come those 31st's which you will cherish down memory lane! I promise.

^*^Clouds^*^ said...

Even I think 31st is overrated.

And I agree - "I learnt you never have friends-you only think you have them.."

Of the new friends you've found,I hope I'm one of them..
And all the best for the blue confetti dream... :)


onnesha said...

i thought i had the lousiest 31st every year!
i think delhi helped you grow up in a big way.being away from home,or 'uprooted' as you would like to put it,helped you to look at things objectively.and you know,there is always some stray mud and earth clinging onto those estranged roots.
have a great year ahead.love.

Lucid Darkness said...

Happy New Year BDC!
Growing up is never easy, especially when it happens too fast. Cheers.

little boxes said...

@neel:i shall wait
@clouds:ofcourse duh
onnesha:join the club
@LD:yes hon,i am sure you understand
@all:have a great year

^*^Clouds^*^ said...


The Mad Girl said...

czzvaaWell I don't know what to say.A lot of bitterness comes through, a lot of pain which of course are inevitable when you are in the process of growing up.But then one needs to grow up too.I hope this new year brings more happiness and fulfillment. Happy New Year.
p.s- lovely p.s

zahid said...

Same pinch at the lousy 31st....mine happened on a train....*sigh* thoughi see no difference had it been otherwise... A nice year round up....

Have lots of sunshine in the new year !!!

little boxes said...

@mad girl:yes,u got that right.
thanks so much for understanding

Shreya said...

The comment box of your blog probably isnt the best place to say all this, but you should know that there are "some" people who thought you are their "good friend" supposedly.Trust me "they" are equally disillusioned if not more.Heh.Happy new year.

little boxes said...

@shreya:you were right,this isnt the right place to say this.and if you ask me,i could tell you "lots" of names in reply to your "some".
and i,in no way,have made any personal allegations...it holds true of most of my school friends.
and its not just me,it happens with everyone...

durjoy datta said...

happy new year......!
i too had a lousy 31st!
like everytime........
you are not alone....!

WHAT'S IN A NAME ? said...

"So here I end, with eyes full of dreams which strive for fulfillment and a mind full of hopes that things don’t get any worse."....that sums it all up.

Happy New year!